Genetically Superior

Dimensionally Dim-witted by Tony
July 19, 2008, 5:17 pm
Filed under: Technology, Written by Tony | Tags: , , , ,

So Dreamworks wants to make us start watching all of its animated movies in 3D. And I really can’t think of a worse idea. For decades movie studios have been trying to get audiences to embrace this “new” dimension of movie reality, and it’s never caught on. It’s not because people don’t like seeing things in 3D, but rather the fact that we already do.

Think back to the last time you saw a movie in 3D. It could have been an IMAX film or the Honey I Shrunk the Audience attraction at DisneyWorld. Stuff jumped out at you, maybe convinced you giant snakes were slithering off of the screen. But remember how fuzzy the images were? How funny it felt to walk around afterward, after your eyes had adjusted to the abnormal and dizzying focus?

3D is a bit like virtual reality (which, like the flying car, is lying in the future’s never-to-be bin) in that it is a better idea in prototype than it is in production.

We’re ok seeing images on a two-dimensional screen. Dreamworks ought to be reminded that our brains are well-equipped to interpret perspective. We know that the larger an object is, the closer we are to it. If they really want to put asses in seats, maybe Dreamworks ought to focus on creating the kind of quality cinema their adversaries over at Pixar are putting out.

The notion of having to wear special glasses through the next Shrek installment (if its official title is Shrek 3D, I’ll kill a newborn) isn’t something that will convince me to line up early and see it on opening weekend. But the promise of a film with fantastical detail and an immersive story line (praise: WALL-E) is something that would.


1 Comment so far
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Shrek is a dick anyway. Fuck him.

Comment by awesomekaptain

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